Da Hokey Pokey Tribe
One night, many years ago, Sir Nigel Fatbottom and Lord Snot met at their club The Raging Bore. Somewhere between a load of "quite right, quite rights and jolly goods" Sir Nigel said "I say old chap, it's time I made a name for myself as an explorer" Before replying, Lord Snot took a careful sip of his Sherry. (Which was no mean feat as he had an extreme overbite, most likely caused by hundreds of years of inbreeding). "I daresay Fatbottom, that's a jolly good idea. What do you propose?"
"I'm willing to bet you 5p that I can discover a new tribe deep within the Amazonian Jungle" said Fatbottom. "I'm willing to take that bet" replied Lord Snot. The two men exchanged moist, flaccid handshakes to seal the deal.
Months later deep within the Amazon Sir Nigel awoke from a fevered dream to hear the sound of ominous drum beats. After heaving his considerable bulk out of his tent, he awoke his retainers and forced them to carry him towards the sound.
"Savages!" squealed Sir Nigel when he saw three Pygmies in a clearing. Hearing the cries of the overweight white man, one of the Pygmies approached and said "No mon, we ain't no savages. We's da Hokey Pokey Tribe. Come, dance with us."
The tribe began to dance and sing. "You put you're right foot in, You put you're right foot out."
"You do da Hokey Pokey and you turn yourself around. Dat's what it's all about"
Sporting a big grin on his happy face, one of the Pygmies approached Fatbottom. "What you so uptight about mon?"
"Don't worry, be happy" said the next Pygmy.
Amused by the silly white man's reaction the third Pygmy rounded on him and cried "Boo!"
Well, this frightened Fatbottom so much he soiled himself as he ran past the Pygmy shrine. As he retreated into the jungle, Sir Nigel could hear the sound of laughter behind him. And the words "Skittles, taste da rainbow" followed him as he ran.
These figures are from Reaper Miniatures, stand at 30mm and were sculpted by Bobby Jackson. The masks were quite flat so I free handed the dots and some of the squiggles in order to give them some life.